Second Date: Tips for the Most Important Meeting

A second date is just around the corner, and you’re more nervous than before the first? No wonder! The first date is a kind of qualifying game, a time to sniff each other out, to test the waters. The second date is about really getting to know each other deeply and discovering each other. While the first meeting reveals whether you like each other and whether you like what you see, the second one raises the question: Could this really become something serious? With our tips for the second date, your reunion will be enjoyable, perhaps even more so than the first.

4 reasons why a second date is a good idea

1. Their eyes met frequently

Whether it was during a conversation, when you both reached for the salt shaker at the same time, or when you burst out laughing, your eyes always met. How exciting.

2. The bodies were facing each other

Shoulders open, arms relaxed at your sides: During your conversation, your bodies were open and facing each other. These are all positive signs: Body language adapts to the other person when sympathy prevails and a flirtation develops.

3. There were many topics of conversation and there was no silence

The conversation flowed smoothly, and time flew by: one topic of conversation would emerge from the last, and you never had to rack your brains about what to say next.

Great! The fear of silence is widespread and can be paralyzing; a lively conversation is always a good sign.

4. They laughed a lot and often together

Humor and being able to laugh together are an important foundation for a relationship. This doesn’t mean that you both always appreciate the same comedian, but rather that you get along well and feel comfortable with each other.
If you’re unsure, ask yourself: Would you like a second date? If you can say no to that, you don’t have to go on another date. If not, then look forward to many more.

When should the second date take place?

All those dating rules we know from Hollywood movies – “Don’t contact me until after three days,” “The man always contacts you first” – please forget them. The freedom we live in here always brings with it a certain amount of uncertainty.
You’ve left the clichéd dating rules behind us – great! Now the question remains: When is the ideal time for a second date? The answer is relatively simple: Whenever you feel it’s right.
Regardless of whether you want to see your date tomorrow or next week – there’s no point in generalizing this question. Because everyone feels differently. The most important thing: Just be honest with yourself and don’t torture yourself by thinking you have to wait several days.

24 things you can do on your second date

Once the initial hurdles have been overcome and you’re both ready for a second date, the next big question is: Where should we go? A nice café is often enough for a first date, as it’s about getting to know each other. The second date means more; you already know each other a little and want to explore things in more depth.

No matter what time of year you meet, we have great ideas for you: 

Spring	Summer	Autumn	winter
zoo	Pedal boating	wine tasting	Escape Room
amusement park	Open-air cinema	football	Murder mystery dinner
Canoeing	Hike	Oktoberfest	Ice skating
tennis	City tour	squash	To ski
concert	To swim	Halloween party	Christmas market
tourist	Cocktail course	Walking in the park	Baking cookies

Who should ask for the second date?

Anyone interested can get in touch – regardless of whether they’re male or female. Whether you do it right away on your way home or three days later – trust your gut feeling; it will tell you whether you should take action or not.

Thankfully, we’ve long since left behind old gender stereotypes like “the man contacts first” and “women who contact first are easy to get.” Women are in the same position as men and don’t have to be passive and wait. It’s not uncommon for men to be insecure and somewhat shy—and then be very grateful to courageous women who make the first move.

The second date at home – pros and cons 

Have you ever wondered how it will be received when your date comes to your home? Many people feel a great ambivalence.

So the answer to that question is entirely up to you . If you don’t mind it, or would even feel more comfortable at home, then no problem. If you do, you know of many alternative date options that can also make for a fun day.

---

During the meeting: What you should pay attention to on the second date

1. Pay attention to your expectations

People tend to want to add something to everything. It always has to be faster, better, more amazing—no, it doesn’t have to be. Stay relaxed and enjoy each moment as it is in its own unique way.

2. Don’t tell your life story directly

Of course, you want your date to like you and, ideally, fall in love with you. But you can’t force it by telling them everything on the first and second date. Let your date have their say and actively listen – this will lead to truly personal conversations.

3. Stay authentic

You now know some of your dating partner’s stories and characteristics. Be careful not to try to adopt their “desired characteristics” and pretend to be someone else. That won’t end well sooner or later anyway. Stay the way you are, because that’s what works well. A person with rough edges.

A kiss goodbye on the second date? 

On the first date, you didn’t kiss goodbye; the fear of rejection and the uncertainty about whether you really wanted to kiss each other were too great. By the end of the second date, you had gotten to know each other much better. Conversations from the first date had deepened, and new topics had been discovered. Not to mention, you’d already had two shared experiences.

If you’re unsure whether you can continue dating, you shouldn’t raise false hopes with a kiss. However, if you have butterflies in your stomach, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with it. Enjoy it and look forward to more dates.