Conversation topics for a date
Mental Health

Conversation topics for a date – the best questions to get to know each other

The premise for impressive conversation topics lies in successful communication – not just when getting to know someone, but in many situations in life. But especially during the getting-to-know-you phase, the question of suitable conversation topics arises. What questions are interesting to ask when getting to know someone? What does your date want to talk about? What topics should you avoid? If you’re looking for answers to these questions, you should be curious.

6 conversation topics for the first date

Are you about to go on your first date and feeling nervous? You’ve probably already run through various scenarios in your head about how the first meeting might go. Naturally, you’re wondering which topics of conversation will resonate and which won’t? Good small talk is difficult for many people. You only know your counterpart very sporadically and are therefore unsure about possible topics of conversation. You can’t go wrong with these six topics:

1. Relaxed small talk to start

Start off casually with small talk. It couldn’t be more authentic, and you can also think about what topic you want to move on to next. Remember, you want to get to know your date. Listen actively and show genuine interest.

Top 5 questions to get to know each other for a relaxed start to the date

  1. Did you find your way here easily?
  2. How has your day been so far?
  3. What have you done today?
  4. Nice to see you, how are you?
  5. What would you like to do?

2. Leisure

Once you’ve found a good starting point, questions about your leisure activities are always a good way to get to know each other better. Perhaps small talk revealed a little hint about some of your date’s leisure activities. If not, you can charmingly steer the conversation toward them.

  • What do you like to do in your free time
  • How do you like to spend your weekend?

If you would like to be more precise, you can also ask more targeted questions.

  • What kind of books do you like to read?
  • Which sports interest you and which ones do you actively participate in?
  • Do you like going to the cinema?

3. Talk about travel

Another interesting topic of conversation for your first meeting is travel. We all need time off, whether it’s an hour’s drive to the Baltic Sea or a 12-hour flight to Los Angeles. We all have different ideas and preferences when it comes to travel. This is a great way to find out exactly what your date is passionate about and what’s completely out of the question.

  • Which countries have you been to?
  • Where have you enjoyed it the most so far?
  • And what is your next goal?
  • What type of travel do you enjoy? (Backpacking, relaxing holidays, active holidays, city trips, etc.)
  • What would you like to try someday?

4. Profession

What do you do for a living? This getting-to-know-you question will almost certainly come up if you haven’t already touched on the topic while writing. Regardless, discussing your career is always welcome, as it provides a sense of security. After all, you deal with it every day. Incidentally, interest in your career is also one of the most important qualities that both women and men desire in a relationship.

  • What do you do for a living?
  • What are your daily tasks?
  • Are you satisfied with your job?
  • What do you like most about your job?
  • Would you like to change something?

5. Goals and dreams

Don’t we all have our dreams to strive for? It’s a great time to let your mind wander and talk about wishes, dreams, and goals. Don’t be too rigid; just ask freely.

  • What is your biggest dream?
  • What are your goals for the next 3 years?
  • Is there anything you still really want to achieve?

6. A creative topic of conversation: role models

Whether parents, celebrities, or politicians, each of us has a role model whose perspectives and characteristics we 100% share, and we strive almost meticulously to emulate them. This is a great topic of conversation for your first date, not only to learn about role models but also to learn about your counterpart’s perspectives. Role models are also an ideal starting point for in-depth conversations.

  • Who is your biggest role model?
  • Why is he or she your greatest role model?
  • Are there other role models that inspire you?


What topics of conversation do women particularly like?

  • Everything about fashion and styling
  • Entertainment – current movies and series
  • Philosophizing about life
  • Hobbies and leisure
  • Serious topics that require your personal opinion
  • Food and Drink
  • Friendships, relationships with family


Which questions to get to know each other are well-received by men?

  • Sport is a hot topic for most men
  • Embarrassing, brave, shrill, funny or life-changing experiences
  • Hobbies and leisure
  • Cars and technology
  • Funny stories from the past, e.g. school, studies, training
  • Friendships, relationships with family


What can you do when you run out of things to talk about?

The whole question-and-answer game can get a bit tiring over the course of a meeting. The thought of always having a question ready, combined with nervousness and uncertainty, can quickly become overwhelming. But try to stay relaxed; if you run out of things to talk about, it’s absolutely okay.

A little silence and a break to catch your breath will help calm you down a bit from the excitement. It also gives you the opportunity to take a short breather and briefly process the whole conversation. It’s also nice to not talk for a while, perhaps just walk hand in hand through the park and enjoy the moment.

If you still feel the urge to ask more questions to get to know each other, just ask again about things that you may not have understood so well or that particularly interest you about the person you are talking to.

“I know we’ve already talked about this, but can you explain to me in more detail what you do all day at work?”


5 topics you should avoid

As many questions as you can ask, there are still some topics that don’t necessarily speak in your favor if you bring them up. Here’s a quick summary of the most important getting-to-know-you questions you should probably avoid:

  1. The ex-partner is definitely taboo.
  2. You should also avoid anything related to sex for the time being.
  3. The topic of money is very sensitive, you should definitely not bring it up.
  4. Family problems are not topics of conversation for a first date.
  5. Embarrassing stories that don’t necessarily put you in a positive light.


Checklist: The do’s and don’ts of conversation topics for your date

DOS:

  • Small talk for a relaxed introduction with general topics.
  • Deeper conversations on topics where you notice your counterpart blossoming.
  • Consider and allude to interesting topics for men and women.

Don’ts:

  • Stay away from taboo topics: Your ex will stay in the past and you will avoid current problems and embarrassments.
  • Think about balance – there should be a balance between questions and answers between you.

Hello! My name is Scarlett Walton β€” I’m a former practicing psychologist and now a writer dedicated to helping people find emotional balance, inner peace, and personal growth. For over 12 years, I worked in the field of psychology, supporting individuals through anxiety, relationship challenges, and major life transitions. My Professional Journey I began my career in a private therapy practice in Chicago, where I counseled adults and teens on self-esteem, anxiety disorders, and emotional healing. Over the years, I conducted more than 5,000 sessions, took part in educational programs, and led workshops of my own. But at some point, I realized I wanted to share my knowledge with a wider audience. That’s how this blog was born. A Personal Story A few years ago, I went through a painful divorce. It was a turning point in my life. I experienced the full spectrum of emotions I had helped others navigate for years. That was when I began to write. I felt a strong desire to reach out to those going through difficult times β€” even if we couldn't meet in person. Writing became more than self-expression for me. It became a continuation of my therapeutic work β€” through words, advice, personal stories, and emotional support from afar. The Mission of This Blog This blog is a safe space for anyone seeking answers, encouragement, or simply a bit of inspiration. I share not only professional insights but also real-life experiences, reflections, and practical advice rooted in years of practice. I truly believe that words can heal. If even one of my articles helps you feel a little more understood or a little less alone β€” then I know I’m on the right path. Welcome, stay awhile, and most importantly β€” be kind to yourself πŸ’›