The assumption that men have to make the first move is thankfully long outdated. However, many women still don’t dare to take the first step. So, what’s the best way to approach it? Here’s what to look for when approaching men.
Approaching men: With these 11 tips, the first step will be child’s play
Many women know this: You see an attractive man on the train, in the supermarket, or simply in passing. While you’re racking your brains for how best to approach him, the moment has already passed, and you’re later resenting your own shyness. But that’s over now! With these 11 tips, the next time you make contact, it’ll be a breeze.
1. A look says more than a thousand words
If you have someone on your radar you’d like to approach, it’s always a good idea to test your chances first by making eye contact. If he responds to your gaze and maybe even smiles right back, you’ve definitely got the green light. If he looks down, embarrassed, it could be that you’re simply dealing with a shy man. Here, too, you should take the initiative quickly. And even if your chosen man doesn’t respond to your gaze immediately, that doesn’t mean he’s not interested.
2. Please smile!
Similar to eye contact, you can also gently test how the other person reacts to you with a bright smile. If they immediately light up or even turn a little red and embarrassed, you shouldn’t waste any time and approach them. And even if they haven’t noticed you yet, you should greet them with a warm smile when you approach them.
3. Have an eye for detail
He’s sitting in a café reading a book? Talk to him about it! He looks like he’s on his way to the gym? Here, too, you have a conversation starter ready. Pay attention to small things that will make it easier for you to start a pleasant conversation. Your counterpart will surely be delighted if you notice such small things.
4. Think first, then speak
Think about how you want to address him beforehand. This way, you can avoid any stammering and prevent the initial conversation from ending too quickly.
5. Nothing ventured, nothing gained!
In many everyday situations, you only have a few moments to decide whether to approach someone. You should never hesitate to make the first move, because once the situation has passed, you’ll surely regret not having acted more quickly. So, if you spot someone at the train station or while walking by, take the initiative quickly. In such a case, it’s less of a problem if you don’t have the right conversation starter ready right away.
6. Let your friends stand for a moment
If you’re traveling in a group, you should leave the group behind for a moment to approach a man. You don’t want your partner to be overwhelmed by the situation and quickly flee. That could easily happen if five of you approach him at once, staring expectantly.
7. Cheeky pick-up lines? No thanks.
A memorized, humorous flirting line can quickly come across as awkward and put your partner off. Especially in everyday situations, you’re better off approaching a man with a casual, yet serious line. Even if such a flirting line seems funny at first, it’s not a guaranteed method.
8. Compliments are always welcome
Here, too, the rule is: be attentive! Briefly observe the man you want to approach and start the conversation with a compliment on his outfit or hairstyle. This is a straightforward way to start a pleasant conversation, and your intention is immediately clear. Plus, everyone appreciates a nice compliment!
9. Small talk: short and sweet!
When approaching men, it’s best to keep it a brief conversation, as this only paves the way for a proper date. So, don’t jump into a long conversation to get to know each other right away; instead, start the initial contact with a few casual small talk phrases. Everything else comes after that!
10. Give me the number!
In any case, you’re on the safe side if you’re the one who gives him your number. This gives him a chance to take the next step and text you. If he doesn’t get in touch after a few days, you know he was just being polite and wasn’t interested.
11. Not interested? Checked!
You’ve gathered all your courage, approached a man, and gotten rejected . Now it’s really important: don’t lose heart and give up! There are a thousand different reasons why he’s not interested in you. So put the encounter behind you, don’t worry about the rejection, and move on to the next cute guy!
Where can I approach men in everyday life
There are many everyday situations in which you might run into an attractive man : whether it’s in the supermarket, at the gym, or at a bar in the evening. Often, you don’t have the courage to approach the man and end up feeling very annoyed afterward. To make this a problem in the past, we have the best tips for approaching him in everyday life.
1. At the gym
Gyms are usually filled with attractive men, and there’s no shortage of topics for good conversation starters. Many men would certainly be flattered if you asked them how to use a particular piece of equipment or how to perform an exercise correctly. This way, you’re addressing them, but they have the opportunity to show off their best side and impress you.
2. Approaching men in the supermarket
The supermarket is also a better place to approach men than you might think. The first step is to take a look in the shopping cart. If it’s baby food, diapers, or tampons, it’s a no-brainer, and you can avoid being turned down right away. However, if the shopping basket looks more like a singles dinner, you have a green light: Ask him about the wine he’s already packed or where a certain product you discovered in his basket can be found in the store. This quickly sparks a casual conversation, and you can walk out of the store with one more cell phone number under your belt.
3. On buses and trains
There are many opportunities to skillfully approach a man while traveling. It’s always easy to ask for directions on the bus or train. But don’t hesitate too long, because the next stop could be his.
5. In a bar
A bar is one of the classic meeting places. The atmosphere is lively, and flirting starts quickly. This is the perfect place to play with eye contact and a smile before approaching a man. Pay close attention to his body language – an open posture and returned glances indicate that the interest is mutual. Go for it!
6. Approaching men in a nightclub
Of all the places, this is probably the most lively place, which is why approaching men is usually quite easy. Give him a compliment to get the conversation started, or give him a few meaningful glances beforehand. Or how about inviting a man for a drink? In a club, you have endless possibilities, and they’re worth taking advantage of.
No-Go’s when approaching men: You should avoid these
When approaching men, there are some pitfalls you can fall into. To avoid these, we’ve listed the 6 most important no-gos for you here:
- Especially in nightlife: too much alcohol!
- Memorized pick-up lines
- overly strange humor
- to talk badly about yourself
- approach someone with a group of friends
- be too offensive – rather announce the desire to have children after a few dates
In general, it’s always best to approach someone confidently and naturally. Avoid being overly self-critical when approaching them and remain completely yourself, and nothing can go wrong.
Conclusion: You can learn how to approach men
Of course, approaching a man requires a bit of courage, but if you follow the tips above, nothing should go wrong. Here are the most important points at a glance:
1. Play with your counterpart by repeatedly making eye contact.
2. Approach the man confidently and be brave and quick-witted.
3. Observe the person you are talking to before approaching them so that you have appropriate compliments and small talk topics ready.
4. Just step out of your comfort zone and dare to do it!
5. Don’t let rejection get you down and keep going with the same confidence.
Now it’s your turn: Just give it a try and dare to approach a few men. And who knows, maybe you’ll find your true love among them?
